Saturday, July 26, 2008

2 weeks in

Hey everyone. Many thanks for all the nice comments and emails. It's nice to know I have so many good friends who care about me back home. It's only when you leave do you really realize what great people you left behind. That said, things are still ruling quite hard, and I've had some pretty interesting experiences this first full week in this holy city.

As I said before, there are 2 million extra people in town from July 15-August 15, and since this town is 11 square km in size, that's a lot of friggin people. From 4am until 12pm, the city is always crowded as hell, and motorcycles, bicyclists, cab drivers, and the occassional SUVs battle the crowds with incessant honking, angry shouts, and even the occassional hit with a stick for the obstinately unyielding pedestrians. If you thought driving in America was aggressive and dangerous, just know that the stress these guys must go through to go even 2km is astounding.

I still get lots of dumbfounded stares from the shy, but friendly Indian lads, and have posed for a good number of pics, shaken a lot of hands, and said many hellos and namastes. The huge majority of the people here are boys/men (at least a 75 or 100:1 male/female ratio) between the age of 12 and 25, who are participating in the holy festival, while the women are most likely back at home slaving away. I've introduced a lot of kids to the high-five and thumbs up, which they seem to get a big kick out of. Literally every single one of these guys wears an orange shirt with a picture of Shiva on it, or some variation thereof, orange shorts, and a black fanny pack. It may just be the fashion wave of the future, who knows? For once, I will admit that I don't feel like the skinniest person around, though I'm certainly not putting on any weight with all the yoga I'm doing, and all of the low-fat/low-protein food I'm eating. This is a very un-sexually promiscuous place and culture (though I'm sure behind the curtains things are a different story) and a common site to see is boys and men holding hands or each others shoulders as they walk the streets without a second thought, something very foreign to our largely homophobic culture. Most marriages here are still arranged, and the idea of attracting someone is not something you really seem to have focus on too much or worry about the way you are perceived sexually.

As far as asham living, it's pretty darn modest, but from what I've seen around town, could be a whole lot worse. We keep and wash our own dishes (1 plate, small bowl for dal (lentils/beans), spoon, and cup, all stainless steel), which teaches you a little responsibility I suppose. I'm trying not to keep any secrets, or have much ego about this experience, so I'll say that I have experimented with cleaning myself post-restroom the Indian way, which isn't really pleasant, but I can handle it (no pun intended). Toilet paper is not an easily found commodity, and most Indians don't even understand the concept when asked. I am a lot more aware of keeping thing hygenic though because of this fact, and hand sanitizer is a frequently used commodity. I handwashed and line-dried my first load of laundry yesterday, which was really not a bad experience at all and not nearly as much work as I assumed (though I'm not sure why assumed it would be much work in the first place). Washing machines and dryers use a lot of energy, and after doing this just once, I don't think I'll ever really need them again. It is ridiculously hot here (at least 95-100 every day) and could be unbearable if it didn't rain every single day. Without the fan in my room on full blast, I'm not sure I could survive, but so far so good, though some nights, it takes a little while to get to sleep.

I've met quite a few interesting characters staying at the ashram. There's Paul, the chainsmoking Irish lad who works as a civil engineer back home. Anna from Britain. Henry, ex-spaworker from Seattle and relationship guru. Sunshine, 30-something ex-Southern Baptist Georgia girl, who has stayed at the ashram for nearly a year (by far the longest stay of any non-Indian person). Betty, 40ish Irish-born UK schoolteacher. Ellike, the 27 year old Duchess from Holland and impressive yoga practitioner, who makes sure to tell you she is NOT FROM AMSTERDAM. Jason, the dreadlocked psyhcedelic fiend from Colorado in search of quick enlightenment. Jim, the Australian world traveller who seems to have gone everywhere and done everything (many of those things not appropriate to mention here). Reagan, the 30 year old massage therapist, who tries to cram as much into his life as possible, as well as, as many words into a single minute as possible. A quartet of Japanese boys and girls, whose names I cannot begin to remember, who are all incredibly polite and happy-seeming. A French guy from LA whose name escapes me, but who is an author and documentary film-maker among numerous other hobbies, as well as very funny dancer. Alfred, the very proper Austrian fellow who's been here about 5 weeks, but finds the times between classes "frightfully boring". And Unki, the 28 year old Shanghai Mayahana Buddhist, here to sort her life out and find out what who she really is so she can go back home and sort out her life relationship issues.

I befriended Unki on the first day and took her to town, which seemed a pretty traumatic experience for her. She had to pose for probably 50-75 photos, and by the end was practically running away, like a celebrity from the Paprazzi from the eager Indian boys, begging for "one more please". She has a camera, and agreed to let me take some pictures, which she'll upload to me when she gets back in a couple months, so I'll have something to show you guys eventually. I brought basically nothing here other than clothes and toiletries, and will go back home to nothing. A very cleansing experience, and an important one for me personally. While getting some sort of hair beauty treatment, she managed to meet the former mayor of Rishikesh, and was invited to dine with him and his wife and participate in an aarti (devotional chant/complex religious ceremony) and invited me along. The service was incredibly complex, with a long complicated chant, which the mayor was very proud of, saying it was over 3000 years old, and contained the energy and wisdom of all those years of great saints and sages. We prayed in front of a shrine to Hanuman he had in his residence (the famed monkey-god of India) and cymbals and bells were rung/clanged constantly throughout. I just closed my eyes and enjoyed the clanging and singing, which was a welcome change from the honking horns and shouts going on outside and did feel like a pretty divine experience. Afterwards, a boy came out and performed a complex ritual involving chanting and incensing certain objects, and he applied some sort of bindi (red dot, along with rice) to all of our foreheads, as well as a red bracelet. Though I do find it somewhat odd that the Hindus worship so many different deities, I really think it is just a constant reinforcement that there are many things greater than "you", and the way they humble themselves before these idols is definitely a way to constantly be free from the ego and realize there is something greater and more important than the "I', which I greatly respect. The same is true of their elders and teachers, who they prostrate themselves before and surrender all intentions to. A very respectful people.

Afterwards, we joined the mayor for dinner, and he told us all about his service to leper colonies, helping out the poor, demonstrations against unfair police treatment, and his popularity in the city. He is of the Brahmin caste (highest caste) but sees everyone as equal and all as an expression of divinity. He said when he was an infant, Swami Sivananda (arguably the most famous modern-day yogi in India) held him in his arms and blessed him, and said his father was good friends with him, something I found to be pretty awesome. His wife served us some very tasty items in comparison to the normal ashram fare, so it was a nice change of pace. He says he owns no automobile, and simply has to step foot outside his house before he gets numerous offers to take him anywhere he pleases. His wife was a very submissive and subordinate woman, but very kind. He was remarking on some well-respected guy and said something to the effect of "he even cooked and ate his own meals sometimes, such a great man". I guess here it is still a very common thing for the wife to serve her husband and make sure his happiness is paramount. Feminism is certainly not a well-known term. All in all it was an interesting experience and kind of cool to meet such an important man. I will say he was not too modest about his benevolence and selfless service, and prided himself a lot in the good he does and constantly talked about it, but he was a very kind man, and invited me and Unki back whenever we liked to either participate in the aarti, or have a nice bite.

Also met a nice ashram worker named Raj, who insisted on buying me a cup of chai (tea mixed with milk and spices, very common in India) to cement the fact that we are "good friends". He said he has studied 2 years at the yoga academy in Mumbai, as well as had a year of ayurvedic massage training. He hopes to become a teacher at the ashram (there are 3 right now), but will have to work very hard over the next few months. I tried to thank him for the tea, but he said it was insulting, and just asked that I say we are "good friends", which I did. On the way back, he grabbed my hand and led me across the street, which, I thought was pretty funny. I know what you're thinking, a yoga teacher and massage therapist invites me for a cup of tea and then holds my hand. Looks a little funny, eh? But seriously, this is India...it happens. Really a very nice guy, who now refers to me as "friend" every time he sees me. He told me he makes, and I'm pretty sure I understood this right, 1500 rupees A YEAR. That's like...$40. Hopefully I'm wrong, but I thought I heard him right. Luckily he's from a wealthy family, and is just doing this to get yoga training and experience. All his meals and accommodations are free, and I guess $40 goes a long way here for frivolous items, but still...geez. We have it so well in the US it's almost unbelievable. This money is pretty much like monopoly money here, and I think nothing of giving a 100 rupee tip, which is huge to most of these people. Anyway...

On a different note, I've always been interested in trying an ayurvedic treatment (ancient system of Indian medicine) after all the books I've read, so on a whim, I went to a clinic across the street on Tuesday and signed up for an 11-day Panchakarma (internal and external cleansing) procedure. I figured, though I feel great, you can always feel better, and hey, you only live once (or several million times depending on your school of thought). The doctor has been practicing for 25 years, and he and his 2 assistants, Ram and Shiva, who stand at a towering 4'11 and speak virtually no English, have travelled to 12 different countries where they've set up shop and have much experience in the art he assures me. Every day I get a one-hour, intense ayurvedic massage from Ram and Shiva (who are verrry good), using medicated oils and ghee (clarified butter) on my scalp, face, and entire body. Each day, I change into a paper thong, which I must wear for the entirety, and does not do a very good job of...containing me. Also, they insist every time I walk on the floor I wear these pink sandals that are at least 5 sizes too small for me, but I try to respect their wishes. The treatment actually takes place at the doctors apartment, and not his office, so we walk a good 10 minutes through the crowds, to a very nice place by Indian standards where the work is done. Sometimes his son comes home while I'm getting the massage, but hey, you can't have much ego when you're having something like this done, especially some of things, which I'll mention shortly. After the massage, I undergo somewhat less enjoyable processes. The first three days, I would drink a large cup of ghee, and wash it down with water, then have 10 drops of ghee placed in each eye (which was pretty brutal), and then get a large amount of hot oil applied to my lumbar spine for several minutes, which was actually pretty nice. The last 3 days I got nasya, which consists of sitting over a boiling hot humidifier, and inhaling the water, treated with some sort of mentholated oil, then having Shiva put a few drops of ghee in each nostril and snort them up as far as they'll go, then gargle some sort of mentholated water, then repeat the process several times. It's not very pleasant, but afterwards my nasal passages feel miles wide. In addition to this I get a basti, which is...basically an oil injection in the other end. The first 2 days were not bad, as it was a very small amount of oil and easily retained, but today...Shiva looked at me apologetically and said "today...big basti", and he wasn't lying. I won't go into all the gory details, but let's just say...this better be worth it. I have 5 days more to go, and who knows whether it's all the yoga, meditation, healthy eating, or what, but I am feeling the best I've ever felt in my life, so I'll stick with it, despite some of the discomforts and humiliations.

I'm doing about 3-4 hours of yogasana (a good deal by myself, and a good deal in the INSANELY difficult classes) every day, and at least 3-4 hours of seated or standing meditation. Every day it gets easier and more enjoyable, and I have had some incredible experiences while meditating, unlike anything I've felt before in a natural state, though I won't elaborate too much, as I was once told that it is harmful to talk in detail about your experiences. I will just say that the importance of trust, love, and surrender to something other than your ego is of paramount importance in achieving the bliss of meditation. Will also say that meditation is a lot more than just relaxation. It takes an incredible amount of focus, and is very mentally exhausting, but the feeling you have afterwards is indescribable. Fifty more years of this and who knows... I will say that I am spending my time very productively, and grow to love this system of yoga more and more every day. The name or word you choose to call your "God" or item of surrender/worship is of no importance. As long as you can realize you are nothing in the scheme of things, that is when the mind really becomes clear and quiet, and awareness greatly enhanced. I think I will be a much more spiritual and religious person after this experience, and while no one is really teaching me anything here (the yoga teachers just tell you what to do and provide very little guidance, and the meditation teacher is completely non-understandable) I have heard many times that you are your own best teacher, you just have to be quiet and listen, and that is of the utmost truth.

Alright, well, I think that's quite enough for now. I know I've left a lot out, and could go on for hours about the philosophical ponderings I've undergone with my immense amount of spare time, but I'll spare you for now. Plus, my eyes are starting to hurt and my back is starting to ache, as I've become unaccustomed to staring at a computer screen for 8 hours a day.

I am so thankful for this opportunity, and really feel the most at peace with myself and the universe that I ever had. Onward and upward in this bodily temple of infinite space and bliss. God bless you all and may peace be with you.

Love,

Adam

Saturday, July 19, 2008

So far...

Namaste everyone. Welp, I'm writing from an internet cafe in Rishikesh, Uttarakhand India, the renowned "yoga capital of the world". After a marathon 26 hours worth of plane rides, 40+ hours with no real sleep, a 240 km journey by taxi through Delhi and Haridwar, I made it here in one piece. I flew into Delhi (which comprises Old Delhi (north) and New Delhi (south)) and was set up with a taxi service from the airport. The driver drove me to a hotel that he assured me was very nice and a good deal. I'm not saying he's a liar, but... Anyway, after arriving at the fairly dirty hotel, I was immediately offered drugs, alcohol, and prostitutes by the friendly attendant, which I begrudgingly declined. After about 5 hours of sleep and a cold shower, I was ready to get the hell out of there. Delhi is supposedly the most polluted city on Earth, which is comforting, because I would hate to see anything more polluted than this. During the day, the sun is completely obscured by smog, and the streets are filled to the brim with a wide variety of characters, some friendly, some not so much (there are 16 million altogether in Delhi).

I took a taxi to Rishikesh, which was about 7 hours away (though only about 175 miles or so). The ride was very expensive by Indian standards (about 125 dollars), but it was worth it, and I quickly got over the fact that I was most likely getting majorly ripped off. I got to see some nice countryside after leaving the sweltering stench of the city (which reeked almost unbearably of feces in many places, and which, if stopped even momentarily on the highway, young children would lean into your window and beg for change, not letting go until the speed of the car severed their hungry grips. On the way, there were all kinds of dogs, goats, cows, and monkeys in and around the road, which was the size of a very narrow 1-laner by American standards, and the driver was constantly having to muscle his way in and around smaller taxis, bicyclists, pedestrians, pilgrims, and cow-lead carts, carrying fruits, vegetables, and other goods. The sound of horns is something you quickly get used to, and as my driver from the airport quipped "in India you can drive without brake, but not horn". My taxi driver spoke no English whatsoever, which was fine by me, because it gave me a chance to relax, and enjoy the beautiful countryside. As we got closer to Rishikesh, I noticed more and more people crowding the streets, and a huge traffic jam ensued. Rishikesh is about 25 km from Haridwar (a major pilgrimage site), and it took roughly 2.5 hours to travel the distance. I learned later that this time of year is the Siva/Shiva Festival, which attracts many millions of Indians, who make a pilgrimage through 5-6 major holy spots, including Haridwar, and, unfortunately Rishikesh for one month every year, carrying 2 buckets of Ganges River water all along the way, to whatever their destination spot may be.

When we finally got to Rishikesh, it was just as crowded and polluted as Delhi, much to my dismay. It wasn't until 3 days later that I learned this would soon be over, and the city would return to its normal, tranquil state. I had planned to stay at the Yoga Niketan Ashram, which I'd previously read about, but wanted to stay in their guesthouse first, which is slighty more luxurious (though not much), and does not require you to adhere to all the ashram rules. I took a walk through the city to explore, and it was the most crowded place I've ever been, not to mention I was the only non-Indian, in huge a sea of chaos. I was stared at by everyone, and felt pretty nervous and uncomfortable initially, though that has quickly worn off. I was asked by a few children to pose for pictures with them and many people would smile and say hello. I imgaine I was probably the first American many of these children have seen. Everyone seems to be wearing orange shirts with a picture of Krishna (deity from the Bhagavad Gita) as well as fanny packs, so I feel kind of out of place. I bought some local garb, which is very comfortable and light, and which I plan to wear exclusively from now on. After one night in the guest house, I was ready to go to the more quiet and secluded ashram, which is just across the main road from the guesthous, though about 300-400 feet higher in the Himalayas, and quite a workout. I guess I didn't mention that the city is right on the Ganges River, which is absolutely amazing, and at the foothills of the Himalayas, which are shockingly beautiful. People bathe in the river constantly, something I have not yet tried, though I imagine I will once things quiet down a bit.

I got to the ashram 2 days ago (though it seems like weeks already), and was received warmly. The grounds are inescribably beautiful, with all kinds of exotic vegetation, and huge swarms of playful monkeys running around, who will even go into your room if you're not careful. All of the employees and teachers are Indians, though everyone staying there is either Korean, American, British, Australian, or some other kind of European. It costs about $12 a day to stay, which includes your room, 3 meals, and 4 classes (2 yogasana, and 2 meditation) each day. Quite a bargain. The room is pretty modest, but I am actually growing to like it quite a bit. The bed is as hard as the floor (which I'm used to, because I've been sleeping on the floor for the past 7-8 months). I took my first "bucket bath" yesterday, and it was refreshing after the ridiculously intense 6:30 am yogasana class (for those who don't know, asanas are yoga postures, but "yoga" itself encompasses much more than just the postures). The daily schedule is as follows:

Morning Bell: 4:30am
Meditation: 5:00 am
Yogasana: 6:30 am
Breakfast: 8am
Library study: 9:30 am
Lunch: 12pm
Library study: 2pm
Lecture: 3:15pm
Tea: 4pm
Yogasana: 5pm
Meditation: 6:30pm
Dinner: 8pm

Repeat, but no classes on Sunday.

The days seem like weeks, but I am feeling amazing so far, and shutting myself off from normal activities, desires and acquaintances is very liberating. Much more time to focus on what I came here for, which is self and spiritual improvement, and I am feeling very at peace and quiet-minded thusfar. The asana classes are incredibly challenging, even compared to what I'm used to, and I imagine I will be quite a bit better if I stay long enough. The physical exhaustion does help quiet the mind though, and the relaxation that ensues after is incredibly blissful. There are 2 asana teachers, one in the morning, and one in the evening, and both are the most impressive people I have ever witnessed in person. The effortlessness with which they do the impossible poses, while still teaching and keeping a steady breath is remarkable. The meditation classes are very nice, though I cannot understand a single word the meditation guru says when starting the class, due to his soft voice and heavy accent. The point is that you basically force yourself to sit still and relax for over an hour twice a day, and though it's challenging, you basically feel like you've just taken a huge dose of morphine after.

Despite warnings, I have not gotten sick at all so far, and the food has been very good. All vegetarian, and fairly bland by Indian standards, but you get as much as you want, and it is very nourishing. Usually porridge and tea for breakfast, some sort of lentil/bean/pea/rice combination with bread and maybe some rice pudding for both lunch and dinner, but I haven't been here long enough to really tell. I expected there to be all kinds of long-dedicated spiritual masters here, but most people seem to be just like me, 20-40 somethings just exploring this kind of thing for the first time, and from what I can tell, no one has been here for more than a month, so I'll do my best to be one of the first. I have signed up for the 15-day minimum stay, though I could see myself staying for a very long time. The beauty of everything is just so magnificent, and it's been a very liberating experience so far. I really like the anonymity of everything, and don't feel I need to act a certain way or try to impress anyone at any time, which is very nice. I haven't shaved for a week, which is the longest I've ever gone, and though it looks ridiculous, I imagine I'll have a pretty magnificent beard/moustache in a few months, and some hilarious looking long hair. The other people staying here are very friendly, and I've met about 5 people from all around America, 5-6 Koreans, a Dutch girl, a Chilean fellow, and a couple of Aussies, as well as some people I can't remember. I think there are about 30 people who participate in the daily activities altogether. If I get weary of this place, there are about 20 other major ashrams around the city, so I will probably give them a try before departing, whenever that may be. I also have contact information for Swami Yogeshwarananda, the Swami who recently visited Tallahassee, so I may try to find him once I become more established in meditation and yoga, and may try to become a more serious student, but we shall see. Right now everything is pretty self-directed, but it is easy to have discipline with no temptations around.

Wow, I can't believe how much I just wrote. I'm sure I'm leaving all kinds of things out, but next entry I will try to be a little more discerning, and will hopefully have more things of interest to report (though it may be awhile til I write again). Hope everyone is doing well in America. May peace be with you all and God Bless!

Love,
Adam